February goals

Geez Louise, it's almost half way through February and I haven't even posted my goals for the month yet! Or even finished reviewing my January goals...timekeeping fail.

So let's quickly wrap up how I did with my last few goals for January.

Fear

- Throw away the scales. Check. And I haven't regretted it once. For me they're evil things, which lead to evil thoughts, which lead to evil behaviours. No thank you.

Work

- Maintain a positive attitude. Epic fail. I did well for about the first 3 days...and then it all fell apart. Get me a new job please!

All in all I felt like I gave a pretty good shot at my January goals :)

February goals

I probably say this every month, but I LOVE the feeling of getting to set new goals! (Spoiler alert: since I'm posting these late...I've already told you about ticking some of these off!)

Pleasure
For fun this month I've set 3 goals:
- Celebrate my boyfriend's birthday and make sure he has a special day
- Enjoy going to see Wicked, and soak in the atmosphere
- Suck it up and deal with Valentine's day. I might not like Valentine's day, but I do like candles, so I'm making sure I light it up this V day.

Source

Health
- Stop nighttime snacking. I'm eating just before I go to bed for no. good. reason. I'm not hungry, I don't need anything to eat...so why am I doing it!? There's lots of other times I pointlessly snack, but I'm focussing on curbing this one time for this month.
- Minimise refined sugar during weekdays. I'm packing the grams of sugar in at the moment and it needs to stop. I don't want to stop completely, so this goal is simply about minimising sugar during weekdays and then being more relaxed at weekends. I'll do this through simple swaps such as having salty rather than sweet popcorn.

Source

Fitness
- Run at least 1 other 10k after the London Winter Run. I love this distance, and I want to keep it up. Sometimes I get a bit daunted by doing anything longer thank half an hour so I want to just relax and enjoy these.
- Do one yoga session a week. Things were starting to get a bit busy and yoga was taking a bashing. I prefer to do a couple of yoga sessions a week, but sleep is more important. So if I can squeeze one in a week, just for the mental benefits, I'll be a happy bunny.

Source

Fear
- Run the London Winter Run. Events scare me. I don't know why. I've run for years, I know my limits, my pace, what I can do when I put my mind to it. Yet for some reason when you tell me I have to do it in a certain place, at a certain time, with other people I freak the heck out. And yet I know I love doing events - I love the sense of occasion and the atmosphere! (I know, my thoughts follow no logic!)...but guess what, I DID IT!

Work
- Update my CV
- Sign up for job alerts
Can you tell I want a new job? These are the first basic steps. I don't want to rush in to anything kicking and screaming, yelling "GET ME A JOB, I'LL TAKE ANYTHING, PLEASE EMPLOY ME!". I want to make sure if I move it's in to the right thing, and therefore I want to do this properly.


What are your goals for February?

E x

January 2015 goals - Pleasure update

How is it already February?!

I had quite a few goals for January and I wanted to share with you how I got on with them all. I split my goals up into pleasure, health, fitness, fear and work, so today I'm just going to focus on pleasure. My goals were:

- Book theatre tickets. My boyfriend and I got vouchers last Christmas (yikes!) and have never got round to booking anything. We know we want to go and see Wicked, we just need to book it!

- Make the most of our week off at the start of January. It's already flying by, and I've spent an embarrassing amount of it sleeping, so need to get on with this one!

- Make sure my boyfriend has a wonderful birthday at the end of the month

- Write an email to a friend I've lost contact with

- Write all the online recipes I use frequently into a recipe folder...it's such a pain having to boot my laptop up every time I want to cook!

(I always tend to have a few more pleasure goals, as they tend to be more one off to dos, rather than ongoing challenges).

Book theatre tickets
Check!
I may have spent 30 minutes on the phone, getting passed between the same 2 call centre workers (!) but I got there. We're going to see Wicked this Saturday and I am psyched :)

Source

Make the most of our time off at the start of January
I struggled with this one. I spent the whole time wanting to tidy or mope around. Still, we did get out to the Zoo (!), went for a wintery walk, and generally chillaxed. Lesson learnt though: staycations are haaaard.

Make sure my boyfriend has a great birthday
EPIC FAIL!

Urgh disaster. With all my tummy problems his birthday was an almighty car crash. I've got some serious making up to do and need to get a "fake" birthday put in the diary.

Write an email to a friend I've lost contact with
Check!

Email written, and responded to - followed by a chain of emails. It was so nice to hear about her life and how she was doing. It had been almost 2 years since we'd caught up, and yet we used to live together! Proof that life can all too easily drive people apart if you take your eye off things. Hopefully we'll meet up next time she's in London.

Create a recipe folder
Check!

It's not fancy or pretty but all my recipes were written up and put in a folder to save me logging in to my computer every time I wanted to cook. Unfortunately my low FODMAP diet means I can't use most of the recipes...so I need to add some new, low FODMAP friendly recipes in.


Pretty happy with how I got on with these. Bar my boyfriend's birthday (which was probably the most important one for me which is a bummer) I got most of the way there. Looking forward to Wicked!

What was your favourite pleasure goal you achieved in January?

E x 

January 2015 goals - Health and Fitness update

I'm pretty chuffed with how I did on my fitness goals! My health goals not so much...

They were:

Health

- Focus on stabilising my blood sugar

- Keep as close to the meal plan when I'm back at work

Fitness

- Run a 7k

- Do 10 proper push ups

Stabilising blood sugar
This did get better as the month went on, but I'm eating so many more sugary foods than I used to and it's not great. This is something I want to work harder at in February - need to define a goal that gets me a bit closer to blood sugar stabilisation.

Source

Keep to the meal plan
Fail!

This failed for 2 reasons. The first is that not having a kitchen, or any space to even cut vegetables, makes things almost impossible. The second is that all my stomach pain has thrown me sideways and I've been using the limited food choices I have as an excuse to eat rubbish. Sort it out, Emma!

Run a 7k
Check!

In the first week of January I smashed this and ran a 10k! That led me to signing up for the London Winter Run which was a massive fear for me. So this goal was well and truly ticked off! I love it when you set yourself goal at the start of the month, never thinking that you'll blow it out of the water :)

Do 10 proper push ups
Half tick.

So each week I added on an extra push up, starting at 5 in one go, and on the 31st January pushing it up to the final 10. And I did it, non-stop, without collapsing! However to say I'm properly doing them is a lie - I definitely don't go all the way down and up. Will keep on trying to improve these over February though :)

Source

What were your health and fitness goals for the month?

 E x

Fuelled by a banana

I RAN THE LONDON WINTER RUN 10K!!!

And boy does it feel like there's a weight off my mind. 

I'm going to do a separate post recapping the event but there's a bit more detail below. 

Happenings

This week was set to be a good one as it way my boyfriend's birthday. We had a lovely dinner with his family planned at the amazing Toto's restaurant in Kensington, and I'd organised a special day out on Saturday to celebrate properly. The reality was a lot of cancelled plans and a lot of time with me in bed in pain. 

Toto's - Source

I managed to get myself out to the family dinner but spent most of the time trying not to pass out. I haven't had pain that bad for a long time, even walking was a challenge. I probably came across very rude to his family (and to the staff at the restaurant since I ate about 2 mouthfuls...). Things weren't too bad for the rest of the week until Saturday when I woke up feeling nauseous and with stomach pains. I managed to make it to my therapy appointment, though struggled not to throw up when talking about food, and then went to a coffee shop where I sat very still as any movement made me feel in pain. When I met up with my boyfriend we got as far as lunch before he took me home where I spent the rest of the day asleep in bed.

I felt so awful. I completely ruined his birthday...twice in a week! And the worst girlfriend ever award goes to...me... 

I did make him a cake though (one that I couldn't even eat as it had wheat in it - sacrifice right there). One positive brownie point against a lot of minuses. So I've got a lot of making up to do. 

By the time it got to race day I'd only eaten a banana, 2 slices of toast and some popcorn the day before. Not exactly fuelling! So I scoffed a banana a few hours before the race and got the adrenaline going. Thank god for adrenaline! 

Source

This would have been a particularly effective adrenaline stimulant.

But after a super cold start, and a shaky start, I did it :)

(Not the best photo...I may have accidentally temporarily broke my phone camera by smashing a perfume bottle over it. Lesson learned: never try and be fancy shmancy and take perfume with you to a race).

The rest of the Sunday was spent warming up on the sofa, eating carbs, and then going to support my boyfriend at an exhibition stand he'd organised for his work. 

Eatings

As you can imagine, food has been all over the place this week with stomach pains. A lot of plain foods such as popcorn. A lot of low fodmap foods such as eggs (so many eggs). And a few spoonfuls of the amazing food at Toto's - melanzane parmigiana followed by truffle risotto. 

The more exciting meals included a quinoa stuffed pepper with pinenuts, spinach, mint and sundried tomotoes. With a side of THE BEST homemade gluten free bread and salad.

Banana, chia and nuts with the remaining peanut butter - best breakfast on the go!

HAZELNUT BUTTER! Oh dear lord, where have you been all my life? Obvs with banana because you just can't beat that combo. Oh, and raw cacao. Raw cacao makes chocolate at breakfast acceptable.

Movings

Zero yoga = sad Emma. But 2 5ks and a 10k (woop woop!) = super happy Emma!!

Thinkings

Most of my week was spent thinking "I hate my job" and "I hate my stomach". C'est la vie...it'll get better. Friday I'm probably heading back to the Dr. to see if they'll do any tests to rule out other nasties and confirm IBS. I imagine they'll send me away again empty handed, but I owe it to myself to try.

As for the job, I'm considering alternative careers. I wonder whether there's such a thing as professional duvet tester?

Source

I've also been reflecting on my January goals. I'll be doing a run down of each goal in blog posts for the next few days, but I'm pretty proud of my achievements! I'll also be listing out my February goals to keep my accountable.

Have a great week everyone!

E x

What did you do this weekend? What's your favourite nut butter?

Digesting my digestive problems

Oh dear, there's nothing like a cheesy pun on a Sunday to get things going..

Happenings

This week's been a fairly quiet one here. Finished one of my ongoing projects at work and spent some time working from home. There really is nothing that beats waking up in your own bed, then spending the time you normally commute going for a run in the fresh air, and sitting at your own desk in peace and quiet with your slippers on!

On Thursday I headed to my GP to discuss some digestive problems. I've had problems for years and have done my best to ignore them (because that always works, right!?). When I was restricting my digestive system basically ground to a halt so I blamed all my digestive discomfort on that. When I started eating more I developed insensitivities to a number of foods such as oats and most recently wheat. But the digestive problems went beyond that - stomach cramps, bloating (so much bloating!), constantly changing toilet habits (enough said...)...and it was only getting worse. I tried to constantly try and blame it on unhealthy things I was eating but it was clear that wasn't it.

Source

Since I started my meal plans with the dietitian I've been pretty much in constant pain during the afternoons and evenings. It shocked me how much how my stomach felt affected my self confidence. It was starting to get unbearable and I felt pretty helpless.

Whilst I was at home over Christmas I found out my Mum had been diagnosed with IBS when she was younger, and it made me realise I had to just face my problems and find out whether that's what my problems were. I don't know why I'd been pretending the problems weren't happening for so long - they clearly weren't going to get better, and a diagnosis was only going to help me find solutions.

I also read Roni and Sarah's blogs, and they've both been tackling their digestive problems recently. It gave me that added push to go and see the Dr. I love the blogging community!

After describing my symptoms the Dr said it probably was IBS. She explained that it's highly linked to stress and mood, and that the amount of stress my body has been under over the last year has probably made it worse.

She wasn't particularly great in providing any useful information for how to improve my symptoms, other than "try to relax"...gee, thanks. I've got an information sheet, and have already done quite a lot of research into things like the low FODMAP diet which I'm going to give a go. If anyone's looking for a great book to introduce the FODMAP diet I highly recommend this one. I'm hoping to go back to my dietitian so that she can provide some advice and help with my meal plans.

Movings

I took a bit of a break from running as I had some foot and knee pain from my 10k the other weekend. I managed to get out for a 9k though this morning and things felt nicely healed!

Other than that, lots of walking and the odd yoga session.

Eatings

Salads and healthy snacks to avoid uncontrolled eating whilst working from home.

Some hot water and lemon to start the day.

Post run waffles made with eggs and coconut flour. With sides of caramelised bananas in date syrup and warmed berries.

Eggs fried in coconut oil with a side of frozen berries. Breakfast low FODMAPs styley....oh yeah. And can I please drawer your attention to the size of that grape! It's almost the same size as the egg yolks!

Thinkings

The whole IBS thing has kind of thrown me sideways. When you've had an eating disorder and you get a good way down your recovery you kind of think, "great, this is it, we're back on track! I'm now going to be perfectly healthy for the rest of my life". You start enjoying food and trying all the things you've disallowed yourself from eating for years. You get interested in nutrition and remember that food is there to nourish us. You start getting to know your body again, and appreciate all the things it can do.

IBS is being a bit of a party pooper on my new life and I'm not a fan. It's making me not want to eat because of the pressure in my abdomen, it's making me have to start restricting the range of foods I eat (hello all my high FODMAP vegetables), and it's making me hate my bloated body. And that's not to mention the fact that my stomach is painful all. the. time. which makes me want to crawl under a duvet away from society and live a life of consistent drinking of peppermint tea with a cat on my lap.

I know things could be soooo much worse, and I'm grateful for all the ways I'm healthy and that I'm well on my way to recovery and eating the amounts I should be doing. But it is so frustrating when you're eating healthily and trying to nourish your body, and you feel like your digestive system is punishing you.

I'm really hoping that this low FODMAPs diet takes me a step in the right direction!

Hope you've all had great weeks!

E x